This past Saturday, I had the joy of attending the Atlanta GLOW's Young Women Leadership Conference in Marietta. My joy was slightly interrupted, though, as I listened to a couple of the loving and dedicated mothers of these young women express their overwhelm and stress around doing everything in their power to ensure that their daughters figure out the rules of the high school to college to work game. Unfortunately, the majority of these rules are hidden, created and most easily accessible to the favored and advantaged in our society.
As I listened and empathized with these mothers, I thought, "Each one of these young ladies is unique in her talents and abilities and desires, yet they're all following some invisible rules, created by an invisible they, for an invisible trophy.
I know the game isn't changing anytime soon, so I get the urgency around learning how master it, but what do we lose in the process?
Life is precious and time is limited. Must we invest so much of it competing for an invisible trophy only to learn after decades that there is no real trophy, because there is no real contest?
My words of advice to these mothers and their daughters was to learn all you can about the rules of this game. If you must play, pick and choose how YOU want to play. Know that you don't have to play by the rules established by the invisible, favored and advantaged "they."
There are so many cool ways to get what you want without competing to the death, compromising your values or selling pieces of your soul in the process. It's not worth it!
Knowledge, time and experience always reveal that there's more than enough for all of us, an abundance.
When we believe this and choose accordingly, it's a whole different game.
Aspiring Sage, Creative Maven, Fancier of Books, Guardian of Student Experiences, Inner Explorer, Lover of Living & Learning, Partisan of Play, Princess of Joy, Purveyor of Possibility, Vibrational Recalibrator.